Whose Rack is That?

This socialite has been seen all over town recently flashing her obviously enhanced lady parts. We see what a perfect job your plastic surgeon did, but do you really need to be such an attention whore? Find out who can't stop begging for attention after the jump...

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Yep, that's right...Alpo Dog Food heiress, C.Cook just can't stay out of the spotlight. She's been seen all over town canoodling with countless eligible (and ineligible) bachelors. They claim Alpo is for "the real meat lover in the family"...seems to me Miss. Cook was raised according to family tradition.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Thank you to Coleman, the greatest name in camping gear, for showing that their air mattresses are not only fun, but sturdy. New fathers Marlow and Ben take a break from newly adopted daughter, Lindsay Loran, by enjoying a night out on the pavement of their Midtown apartment.
These glowing life-partners are obviously here to stay!

Dicks in Vick

We here at ATLWeekly are committed to reporting up-to-date credible news that not only entertains you, but educates you. In light of the recent charges against Michael Dwayne Vick, we'd like to extend our high hopes that....for the rest of his living years, he shites blood from being gang raped up the ass repeatedly while in prison.
That is all.

Who Wore It Best?

With the success of Dancing With the Stars, Billy Ray has taken the fashion world by storm. J.C. Penney reported record sales so far this August...and the months not over!!! So you tell us...which of these latest trendsetters wore it best?

Celebrity Sighting!

Which way-past-ex's were caught canoodling at a local Joe's Crab Shack? Why none other than Mr. and Ms. Bobby Brown. We can only imagine the conversation went something like this:

Whit: Damn, Bob, we high.
Bobby: Yeah, girl. You should get out there and shake the shack.
Whit: You mean we in a shack? Shack is whack!
Bobby: Oh, shut it bitch. Give me 'dem crabs.

Local eyewitnesses snapped this photo, which we promptly stole from TMZ. We can't be everywhere, all-right?!

Double Dose of Dave

An undisclosed source informs us that local artist, David P, is being stalked by a man that looks just like him. The only discerning difference is the imposter's red, burning eyes. We don't know about you, but that throwback Thriller shit ain't cutting it these days. Dude needs to toss some ice water on those retinas before trying to mimic our man!

It's On!

Despite a calm few days, it looks like our favorite fuedsters aren't ready to lay anything to rest just yet. Local Liverdude, Matty Weave, took his anger to the stage to let us know he ain't going down without a real fight. Will Ben seek retaliation...or quietly accept their fate as eternal frenemies?

Thank You Dry Ink!

We, at ATLWeekly, would like to extend our deepest thanks to our friends and colleagues at Dry Ink Magazine for hooking us up with our first advertisement! We'd also like to thank Matty Weave for his amazing photoshop abilities. He almost killed us after five drafts...he used the word "Christ" a lot when we requested changes...but wasn't it worth it?!

So, go check em' out...they rock. DRY INK

Foes Not Bros? What Happened???

In happier times, you could often see Ben and Matty together discussing important issues such as up-and-coming popular baby names or having a friendly debate over Whole Foods versus Trader Joes.
So, what happened to these former bff's? Insiders tell us that after an intense fight ensued at a local nightspot, Ben put the final nail in the coffin by screaming "Blondie Crotch" to Matt, drawing unwanted attention and provoking what looks to be a major rift that could forever impact the scene. An anonymous reader captured these pictures of the ex-duo having it out.

Dark, Disturbing, and Dangerously Hip

Former American Idol semi-finalist Laura Scott sure adds new meaning to "cutting edge". Never one to leave her party girl image behind (remember the Rob Schneider scandal?), she was seen at El Bar late into the wee hours on Tuesday. Since becoming the new face of Ross, this red-head keeps us guessing. What will she do next?

Shocking and Unbelievable!

After 12 hours of intensive monitoring, it has been reported that K-Hutch is finally out of the I.C.U. after being knocked upside the head by a walnut Wednesday afternoon.



Eyewitnesses claim that prior to the perpetrator being identified, K-Hutch professed that a homeless man had thrown a rock at her head. Apparently a squirrel was spotted moments later playing overhead.

Nobody Puts Mama in the Corner

Fresh out of rehab, seems like Matt-T is up to his old tricks. After winning an Emmy for his portrayal of Jacque Burman on the hit daytime series General Hospital, Matt-T seemed unable to handle his new heart throb status by turning to hookers and hooch.

Always eager to steal the spotlight, his famewhore mom, Liz-Z tries once again to shield her son from the press only to draw attention to herself.
Denial, denial, denial...seems these two apples fell from the same tree.

Celebrity Sighting!!!!!

Obviously Ellen Degenerate is scared about her upcoming nuptials, but local Dick-Hater resident, Karen, is all stars when it comes to their pending wedding. We'll see how this beef-licking festival turns out!

BlueBlock Shock!

Local BlueBlocker, Billy Inman, was recently grossed out by feeling Atlanta's hairiest man. Little does he know, Ben just got the role as ZINC(tm) wearing lifeguard on the 'Rock of Love'. Don't threaten' him with a good time.

Atlanta's Newer Rage: Milking in Public

Upstaging the Suffocation rage, it seems Milking in Public has taken the city by storm. StaTITstics show nipple tweaking has a stronger response rate than not breathing - as demonstated here by areaola lovers D-Man and Ju-Lia.

Cheating With Atlanta's Hairiest Man

Puerto Rican Princess Liza M. caught silencing a phone call from boyfriend Davey while hanging out with local playboy, Ben ThrowHer. Can this Atlanta Diva weave through a sea of hair to find true love? Of course - it's near impossible to flutter through that soft, luscious, heaven-made tuft without being struck by cupid's bow.

Manorexia or Just a Hot Dog (Sandwich)? You Decide.

Local Bulemics Beware! You thought you had support, but two of the top thinsters were recently caught with street meat oozing from their fists. Guess who won't be fittin' in their period jeans this month? That many carbs makes size 6 look like a 2!

That wall of hair ain't hiding nothin', honey!

A Word From Our Sponsors

We'd like to give props to Oral B Stages for turning local musicians Tom and Ben from this...



To this...











Thanks Oral-B Stages!

Whose Knees Dee's Be?

After spending many late nights in compromising positions, it's no wonder the signs of heavy wear have taken there toll on this Atlanta hot shot. Can you name these knees??? Find out who after the jump.


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That's right, it's our very own favorite Liverheart! Looks like Matty had some time to let his legs rest on the lap of another Atlanta scenester during a local Rob's House show. We're just glad to see that even at rest, Matty never stops practicing the things he does best.

Now That's Some Dangerous Lovin'

Fresh from her relationship with Richard Grieco (of Jump Street fame), Sharpy was seen getting cozy with nightclub singer, Tom Cheshire. Seeing as their relationship (yet to be confirmed) is only a few hours old, we're gonna have to question who that baby bump belongs to. Will it come out with the voice of an angel - or is it destined to be Greico's eternal leftovers?

Fight!

His band may be prowling wolves, but All Night Drug Prowling Wolves guitarist Marlow Sanchez is just prowling mad. He was caught at Savannah hotspot, The Crab Shack, shouting at the paparazzi to leave him and fellow band members alone while they fed the alligators. Seems this level headed Mexican can get mighty spicy at times!

Name that Couple

It's time to name the latest duo seen around the ATL! With rising starpower, these two psudeo-celebs are in desperate need of a notable new name.

And the choices are:

Rim and Sting Me
Barlow
Men
Hair and Bare
Throwez
Stick It, Then Pick It
Two Men and, oh, that's it
Rub-n-Chubb

Cast your votes now!

Go Back to Hollywood, Baby

Who are these people and why are they at ElMyr? Really, why?

New Romance Blossoming

Local celeb-fucker, Ben Thrower, lets Trey down easy as he tells him that, yes, in fact, he did once fornicate with that Asian girl from Rushmore.

What makes Throw-her so doable? We think it must be because he was thisclose to taking the lead in Pet Cemetary 2.

Blind Item

Which Atlanta scenesters - both of whom are married - were seen tearing it up on the dancefloor (literally) at North Georgia club, The Blue Ridge?

And, according to eyewitness accounts, it wasn't pretty.